Do I hear you say – “What does that even mean? Of course I am my own friend!”
Here are some questions you can answer for yourself before you jump to any conclusion –
1. Am I fully in touch with my intuition?
2. Do I have set boundaries? And do I assert them with love?
3. Am I aware of my likes, dislikes, beliefs, values?
4. Do I stand up for myself and for what I believe in, even if it means standing all alone?
5. Am I fearless enough to follow my passion without worrying about the material aspect/gain/returns?
6. Do I engage more in activities which I want to do or those I should/have to do?
7. Do I allow other people’s opinions to affect my view of things and of myself?
8. Am I perfectly comfortable in my own skin or do I judge/criticize myself?
And so on…..
I have mentioned just a few questions here. The list is endless and rightfully so, because we are infinite beings born of the infinite source, so obviously there would be infinite ways of befriending yourself. However, this is where the issue arises – we forget that we are infinite beings and we only believe that part of us to be true which we can see, feel, hear. The tangible, finite human part. Even if that is so, erring and imperfection is what a perfect unique human being is all about. There are flaws and mistakes, yet these are all divinely perfect.
Befriending yourself means accepting all parts of you as they are unconditionally without guilt or stress. Accepting the fact that you, like everyone else have always done your best in every moment, whether the outcome was in your favor or not. Either it made you happy or stronger. It is always a win-win. So the first step to befriending yourself is to make peace with everything that you have been through.
The next step is to honor yourself – your decisions, your beliefs, your values. You don’t have certain beliefs to impress others or seek their approval. You have those beliefs because they are your unique set of guiding principles, like lamp posts illuminating your individual path. If a certain belief or decision turns out to be limiting or restraining, it can always be released and it should be, because the ultimate goal is always to grow and evolve till you are one with the light/source. Anything that does not let you move/grow/evolve must be dropped and replaced with a healthier and a more progressive belief/value.
As you start taking the above steps, one of the best by products of this is a habit that gets formed – which is that of a want or desire to relentlessly commit to self-growth and evolution; Then there is no looking back. One is willing to thrash out anything that they perceive as an obstacle in their evolution. When I say thrash out, I mean going any length to heal the self by going within.
Now you will have set forth a cycle of self-growth and healing which will automatically appropriately address the questions mentioned at the start. This cycle, like any other, will happen in phases and layers. Be patient with the process, enjoy it, witness it, learn from it and grow from it. Befriending oneself is as easily a possible reality as is perceived by one.
What I’ve expressed here is merely the tip of the iceberg. There is so much more to being okay with being who you are exactly as you are, as you have been and as you will be….
That it must be –
Experienced by every soul…
Realized at an individual level and…
Expressed through every such unique realization manifested.
Wish you lots of love and light on your beautiful journey of becoming your own best friend!
~ AARYA (Shweta V)